We Must Play An Active Role In Our Success
Falling into stereotypical roles remains a HUGE hurdle to personal and professional success. I know first-hand how easy it is to skip those vital conversations where we establish new roles and responsibilities that promote personal and professional success.
The truth is, when both of you work full time, the domestic arena is fair game and I am calling you out to do what is best for your family; kids or no kids. Happy wife, happy life.
No-one you love, value or care about, at work or at home, will benefit when you are burnt out. This post is all about you being the happiest, most successful and loving person you can be.
Guess whose pregnant? If you haven’t met our super couple yet, you are in for a real treat. You can read the first and second instalments of Mrs. Capable; the ambitious, intelligent young women determined to rise above the statistics of women in corporate culture.
Mrs. Capable and Mr. Right are looking towards the future with a baby. All of Mrs. Capable’s dreams are coming true and she knows deep in her soul that she can and will have it all.
In order to thrive rather than survive, ask for what you need to avoid falling into stereotypical roles.
During her pregnancy, Mrs. Capable is offered a great promotion, with more perks, more money, stock options while positioning her for an executive role.
She wouldn’t want to take on new responsibilities that maybe, perhaps, she wouldn’t be able to keep up with and no longer be seen as Mrs. Capable. She absolutely feels uneasy about passing up this opportunity, but she tells herself that there will be others.
Enter The Baby
Mrs. Capable and Mr. Right are going to need to talk about who is taking time off work when the baby comes and how much. Paternity leave is becoming very common….right? This is a partnership of equals and they support each other to achieve their long term plan and financial vision for their happily ever after.
Mr. Right is a modern man but she just wouldn’t feel comfortable (or even consider) asking him to do more chores, or errands to support their life.
Meet Mr. Fabulous
Mr. Right decides to take a month of paternity leave; he really is fabulous. Let’s start calling him Mr. Fabulous.
It has been a great month and now the time has come for baby to start full-time daycare and both Mrs. Capable and Mr. Fabulous are back at work.
The demands of life are starting to get a little tricky. There is so much to do and with Mrs. Capable managing the house, the baby and working full-time; she is getting burnout and fast.
She reminds herself that her mom did it all.
Mind you her mom didn’t work at a paid job and she also had help from her mom.
They could have split the difference equally between the two of them for household and professional demands…..but they didn’t even have that conversation.
We Live in A Modern World, But Couples Easily Fall Into Stereotypical Roles
If they both took flex days that would allow Mrs. Capable to stay on track for an executive role. She wouldn’t have to sacrifice so much in her career, but…..let’s face it, that just isn’t what Mrs. Capable is all about.
Despite having a salary that was parallel with Mr. Fabulous, Mrs. Capable has cut back to working 80% while Mr. Fabulous makes no arrangements to take even the occasional flex day or enter a work from home option to assist when baby is sick.
At 80%, Miss Capable has lost a significant percentage of her benefits and a considerable amount of her salary. She also is no longer on the track for any kind of promotion. In fact, she strongly regrets passing up on that great promotion she was offered when she first got pregnant.
She needs to work at night after getting baby bathed, off to bed, making lunches and cleaning up; while Mr. Fabulous relaxes or goes for a late workout. He has had a long day, especially after his most recent promotion. He needs to relax and rejuvinate.
Mrs. Capable wonders, “Did I actually willingly throw myself under the bus while making it super easy on Mr. Fabulous?”
OMG, is she becoming part of that statistic where women don’t rise to the top?!?! Ack!
Well let’s be honest, it isn’t that easy for Mr. Fabulous…
Mrs. Capable is so busy being capable she has completely lost her mojo. Sound familiar?
It won’t come as any surprise that Mrs. Capable signed up for my program: Conversations For Success: How To Overcome The Top Three Mistakes Professional Women Make that Keep Them Overworked, Underpaid and Headed For Burnout.
Next week you will learn some key habits to make sure you carry the flame of purpose for Mrs. Capables journey all the way to the corner office!
This blog is written to inspire and support professional women and entrepreneurs who are ready to be the change they want to see in this world.
Until next time, live life in FULL bloom.
your Coach, Lisa