Saying no feels almost luxurious these days; even like an act of rebellion. Use no as a complete sentence? Absolutely!
Don’t get me wrong, yes is a fabulous word. It opens many doors, transcends bias and allows you to embrace your courage to try things that scare you like public speaking or talking to that cute guy who keeps popping up in the aisles at the grocery store.
No is equally amazing. It honours boundaries, fosters self care and cuts through those distractions that are pulling you in a million directions and burning you out.
The melting pot of commitments leads to a personal life that is about as fulfilling as watching paint dry. We turn to our smartphone constantly for that sweet reward of a like or share or a comment.
Why is mastering the art of knowing when to use NO versus YES so important for your life? Between work, family, friends, volunteering and social commitments, answering yes when you want to scream no has left you overworked, underpaid and definitely headed for burnout.The time has come for you to stop saying yes to unpaid overtime, to that new title with extra responsibility but no pay increase and to that group holiday with your drama queen neighbour who makes you forget you are actually a really nice and reasonable person. Hallelujah!
Are you aware that the higher women climb, the greater the wage gap? According to ResourceManager.com when spread out over all occupations, women earn 77.5% of what men do and only 72.5% in upper level executive salaries. Excuse me?
We have all heard of the fight or flight response. It keeps you safe in stressful situations. Once the stressful situation ends, your body chemistry returns to normal. However, if your system is under continual long term stress, it has major implications on your health. The common signs such as fatigue, irritability, lack of focus have become the standard, yet they carry serious implications for your long term health.
Your body heals and regenerates when you sleep; your metabolism runs 10 times faster, wounds are healed, fatigued muscles strengthen and grow and your immune system is boosted. Saying no effectively, confidently and graciously is essential to good health.
Despite the best of intentions, when you are chronically overworked you can unintentionally develop addictions like over-eating, under-eating, expanding daily happy hours and chronic over-spending. The road to poor health is too often paved with the best of intentions.
Use the word NO as a complete sentence.
Something really beautiful happens when you start confidently sprinkling the word no around in your life. You will start saying yes to the things that light you up, the things that just didn’t have any space to show up in your world when all you did was say yes.
The next time you say no, smile first and then let it go; follow up with a question to change the subject. Men do it all the time, it’s really easy for them; you really must try it.
No is authentic. It is honesty. It tastes like victory, happiness, good health and the best darn ice cream you cone you have ever had.
This blog is written to inspire and support professional women who are feeling overworked, underpaid and headed for burnout.
Until next time, live life in FULL bloom.
your Coach, Lisa